Valentine’s Day isn’t just about chocolates, flowers, and romantic gestures; it’s also about fun, laughter, and a little bit of cheeky humor—especially when it comes from the dads! Dads are known for their unique style of humor, often filled with puns, wordplay, and quirky one-liners. And what better way to spread some love this Valentine’s Day than with a collection of funny dad jokes? Whether you’re a dad yourself, looking to entertain the family, or simply someone who loves a good laugh, these Valentine’s Day-themed jokes are sure to make everyone chuckle.
In this article, we’ve gathered over 80 funny Valentine’s Day dad jokes that will leave your loved ones rolling their eyes and giggling at the same time. From playful wordplay to light-hearted humor, these jokes will surely add some extra fun to your celebrations.
81+ Funny Valentine’s Day Dad Jokes
1. Why did the Valentine’s Day card go to therapy?
Because it had too many issues to address!
2. What did the boy squirrel give his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day?
Forget-me-nuts!
3. I asked my wife if she wanted a Valentine’s Day gift.
She said, “No, just give me your time.”
I thought, “Well, I already gave her my heart, but okay…”
4. What’s a vampire’s favorite Valentine’s Day candy?
A “blood” orange.
5. Why do valentines never break up?
Because they’re stuck on each other!
6. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity on Valentine’s Day.
It’s impossible to put down!
7. What did one candle say to the other on Valentine’s Day?
“You light up my life!”
8. I told my wife she’s the queen of my heart.
She said, “Well, you’re the jester!”
9. Why do I always take my wife to the gym on Valentine’s Day?
Because I want to work on our relationship!
10. What did the owl say to his sweetheart on Valentine’s Day?
“You’re a hoot!”
11. I don’t have a Valentine this year.
I guess you could say I’m “single and ready to mingle.”
12. Why was the Valentine’s Day card so good at keeping secrets?
Because it was sealed with a kiss!
13. I don’t need a Valentine’s Day card this year.
My wife already knows I’m “pun”derful.
14. What did the paper say to the pencil on Valentine’s Day?
“I’m drawn to you!”
15. Why was the computer cold on Valentine’s Day?
It left its Windows open!
16. How did the butcher propose on Valentine’s Day?
He “meat” her at the altar!
17. What’s the best way to celebrate Valentine’s Day?
With a “bunch” of love!
18. I told my wife she was the apple of my eye.
She said, “Great, now I’m going to need a fruit salad.”
19. What did the heart say to the other heart on Valentine’s Day?
“I’m ‘beating’ for you!”
20. What did the man say to his wife on Valentine’s Day?
“I love you more than pizza.”
That’s true love… unless, of course, pizza’s involved!
21. Why was the tomato blushing on Valentine’s Day?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
22. What did the bee say to the flower on Valentine’s Day?
“I’m ‘bee’-witched by your beauty!”
23. What do you call two birds in love?
Tweethearts!
24. What did one Valentine’s Day card say to the other?
“I’m falling for you!”
25. Why did the skeleton not ask anyone out on Valentine’s Day?
Because he didn’t have the guts!
26. What’s a Valentine’s favorite restaurant?
Steak and love.
27. Why did the grape break up with the banana?
Because it couldn’t find the “date.”
28. I tried to write a Valentine’s Day joke for my wife, but I couldn’t come up with anything.
I guess I’m just not very good at “spelling” out my feelings!
29. What did the flower say to the bee on Valentine’s Day?
“Buzz off, I’m taken!”
30. Why are love letters like a good joke?
Because they make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
31. Why did the man bring a pencil to his Valentine’s date?
Because he wanted to draw her in!
32. Why was Cupid so good at archery?
Because he always had the perfect “aim” for love!
33. What did the chocolate say to the lover on Valentine’s Day?
“I’m sweet on you!”
34. Why don’t you ever ask a couple of cats for relationship advice?
Because they’re always purrfectly in love with each other!
35. How does a snowman show his love?
By giving his sweetheart a “flurry” of kisses!
36. What did the pencil say to the paper on Valentine’s Day?
“I’m ‘drawn’ to you!”
37. Why is Valentine’s Day like a math class?
Because it’s all about “figuring” things out!
38. What do you call two birds in love?
“Tweethearts!”
39. I’ve got a Valentine’s Day joke for you.
But I’m not going to “knot” tell you just yet!
40. What did one piece of toast say to the other on Valentine’s Day?
“Let’s make this a ‘butter’ day!”
41. Why did the dad go to the bakery on Valentine’s Day?
To get his wife some “sweet” treats!
42. What did the snowman give his wife for Valentine’s Day?
A “frosted” heart.
43. I told my wife, “I love you to the moon and back!”
She said, “Well, then you’d better start budgeting for the ticket!”
44. Why do fathers make the best Valentine’s Day comedians?
Because they know how to “dad-just” the mood!
45. Why was the broom so good at Valentine’s Day?
Because it knew how to sweep its lover off their feet!
46. What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit on Valentine’s Day?
A “blood” orange!
47. Why is Valentine’s Day like a garden?
Because love blooms everywhere!
48. What do you call a monster on Valentine’s Day?
A “love-ogre!”
49. Why did the Valentine’s Day card break up with the envelope?
It felt like it was being “pressed” into something it wasn’t ready for!
50. How do you make a Valentine’s Day joke even funnier?
By adding a “pun-derful” twist!
51. Why was the Valentine’s Day rose so popular?
Because it was “blooming” with love!
52. What’s the difference between a Valentine and a math problem?
A Valentine is full of love, while a math problem always leaves you “numbered” out.
53. Why did the heart go to school?
Because it wanted to “study” love!
54. I gave my wife a joke for Valentine’s Day.
She didn’t laugh, but I think it’s still “pun”believable!
55. What did the grape say to the banana?
“I’m ‘juiced’ to be your Valentine!”
56. What did one hat say to the other on Valentine’s Day?
“I’m ‘fedora’ you!”
57. Why was the pen so romantic on Valentine’s Day?
Because it couldn’t stop “writing” love notes!
58. What did the chocolate bar say to the candy cane?
“You’re so ‘mint’ to me!”
59. Why did the Valentine’s Day card go on a diet?
Because it wanted to be a little less “heavy” on the love!
60. How do you organize a Valentine’s Day party?
You “plan” the perfect date!
61. What did the rose say to the sunflower on Valentine’s Day?
“Stop ‘stalk-ing’ me!”
62. What did the chocolate chip say to the cookie?
“You’re my ‘sweet’ Valentine!”
63. Why do hearts always win at Valentine’s Day games?
Because they’re “full of love”!
64. Why do penguins make the best Valentine’s dates?
Because they’re “penguin-ning” to be together forever!
65. What did the broken pencil say to the Valentine?
“You’re pointless without me!”
66. What’s the best thing about Valentine’s Day?
The “pun”-derful jokes!
67. What do you call two vampires who fall in love on Valentine’s Day?
A “fang”-tastic couple!
68. What did the fish say to the shrimp on Valentine’s Day?
“I’m hooked on you!”
69. How do you greet someone on Valentine’s Day?
With a big “heart-y” smile!
70. What’s the Valentine’s Day’s motto?
“Love is ‘punder’ful!”
71. What did the goldfish say to its Valentine?
“You’re ‘fish-tastic’!”
72. Why is Valentine’s Day so special for cat lovers?
Because love is “fur”-ever!
73. What did the sun say to the moon on Valentine’s Day?
“You’re the light of my life!”
74. Why do dads always have the best Valentine’s Day jokes?
Because they “pun”ish us with them!
75. Why did the balloon break up with the string?
Because it felt “tied” down!
76. What did one piece of paper say to the other on Valentine’s Day?
“I’m ‘folded’ over you!”
77. Why did the cactus get a Valentine?
Because it was “prick”-ed with love!
78. Why was the chocolate bar always so happy?
Because it had a lot of “sweet” love to share!
79. What do you call two pandas in love?
“Panda-monium”!
80. What did the grape say to the banana?
“You’re so sweet, I’m ‘grape’-ful for you!”
81. What did the snowman give his Valentine?
A cold “heart” full of love!
Conclusion
Valentine’s Day is a time to express love, but it’s also a time for humor! These 81+ funny Valentine’s Day dad jokes are guaranteed to make you laugh, groan, and perhaps roll your eyes—but most importantly, they’ll make you smile. Whether you’re a dad looking for the perfect joke to crack, a romantic partner trying to add some lightheartedness to the day, or simply someone who enjoys a good pun, these dad jokes are the perfect way to celebrate love this Valentine’s Day. Spread the joy with these playful one-liners, and enjoy the light-hearted atmosphere that only a dad’s joke can bring!